Like most two-parters on this show, Valhalley of the Dolls runs out of material midway through this second half. The valkyrie story has a couple of cool moments (notably the Russ Meyer-ish motorcycle sequence), but it mostly devolves into messy fighting sequences and repeated moments where Piper dithers over her allegiances. In some ways it reminded me of the Fury episode in season four, only with a pretty flat ending where everybody says goodbye and the valkyries exit without a huge resolution.
I never really understood the logic of Piper telling Leo to stay away from her in order to make his departure less painful. Isn't that sort of the equivalent of abandoning a dying relative so to prepare yourself for their eventual passing? It would have been more effective if Piper ended their relationship purely out of her own unhappiness, and her dissatisfaction with how their marriage has turned out.
The subplots filling up the time here are far worse than their Part 1 counterparts. Paige's dog-walking thing is ridiculous, filled with terrible Look Who's Talking Too CGI and guest stars who were Z-listers years ago but now only make this show look even more dated than usual. Then there's Phoebe and Jason groping each other and making erection gags in front of a crowded office of gawkers, before fucking beneath his desk right after shutting the door. Ugh. This show could not get more trashy.
Valhalley of the Dolls Part 1 had some appeal, but this was pretty tedious most of the time. Couple that with a bunch of horrible subplots and it doesn't spark a whole lot of confidence for the rest of the season. D+
Crimes of Fashion Paige seriously looks like a hooker when she's about to embark on her dinner date with the dog. The dress is ridiculously tight, too short and too low up top. What's the matter with her?
Guest stars Melissa George (Freyja); Ivana Milicevic (Mist); Colleen Porch (Kara); Evan Marriott (Oscar); Eric Dane (Jason Dean)
Writer Brad Kern Director James L. Conway