ATVC 2012: Ringer

Spoilers abound, so beware.

Ringer
22 episodes, CW (September 2011 - April 2012)

I wasn't exactly eager to write about Ringer anymore. I'd already spent a year writing the same complaints over and over again that writing about it even more just had to be some form of sadomasochism. So I'm going to try and keep this short, for everyone's sanity. It sort of goes without saying that Ringer was the disappointment of the year. We watched Sarah Michelle Gellar for seven years on Buffy, in which she proved to be a freakishly multi-talented performer with an enormous range, somebody just at home playing a zany comedy moment as she was pummeling a demon in the face with a hammer. But, as much as I adore her and have this eternal goodwill for her as an actress, she rarely did anything of note on Ringer. You would assume that playing soapy twins would be an actor's dream, but Bridget and Siobhan ended up being personality-challenged drones, just as directionless as they were hard to give two shits about.

Ringer: I'm the Good Twin (1.22)

It had become more and more apparent over the last couple of weeks that Bridget and Siobhan were never going to meet in time for the finale. You can understand the logic. I assume the writers had thought we'd be so wrapped up in the Bodaway/Catherine stories that we wouldn't care all that much if our dueling protagonists ever had that elusive reunion. But, along with everything else on this show, things obviously didn't work out the way they had intended. This was a strange finale -- sort of drab and uninteresting, despite several half-resolutions to a couple of long-running stories. It also had one of the most flat endings I've ever seen. Even if a second season was guaranteed, that sure wasn't much of a cliffhanger.

Ringer: It's Called Improvising, Bitch! (1.21)

I don't think I've ever experienced more critical whiplash in all my years of watching television than I have over the last year. Ringer is a show that has achieved near consistent levels of banality, but it's surely something worthy of scientific investigation that, right before the show is launched into the cancellation abyss, it pulls out of its butt something so ridiculous and so terrible that it becomes sort of, kind of... great? It's Called Improvising, Bitch! was the abject soapiness that this show has seemed to avoid for so long -- a frenetic, hilarious mess that wound up crazily entertaining, like Showgirls-awesome.

Ringer: If You're Just an Evil Bitch Then Get Over It (1.20)

This close to the end, Ringer seems to have lost track of its original premise. We started this long slog through the mist way back in September, with Bridget a troubled young woman doing a stupid thing, and Siobhan the evil twin sister masterminding an elaborate scheme of faked suicide and hitman hoodoo. Could anybody have predicted all those months ago that we'd wind up in April with a show about two morons stumbling around Manhattan proving to be completely ineffectual when it comes to either pro-active investigating, or arch scheming. Bridget has turned out to be dangerously clueless, and Siobhan appears to be just as lost within her own criminal plot as we are at home. Ringer was at one point set in a world that we were led to believe was orchestrated by Siobhan, but plot contrivance has made her an annoying flip-flopper with no long-term game-plan and a penchant for stupid ideas.

Ringer: Let's Kill Bridget (1.19)

Part of the problem with a show that roots its foundation in fake-outs is that you end up spending most of your time trying to spot the fake-out before it arrives. Throughout it's nineteen episodes, Ringer has gone out of its way to set up shock cliffhangers, before pulling back and revealing a frequently annoying sleight of hand. But it's become so routine that any effect they once had has rapidly vanished. Let's Kill Bridget opened with three separate cliffhangers. We saw Andrew making out with Catherine, Henry being interrogated by the police, and Bridget (or is it Siobhan?) lying dead on the ground with a bullet in her chest. Maybe ten episodes ago we would still see all this and be mightily intrigued, but at this point you just wait for the inevitable truth to come flying at you.

Ringer: That Woman's Never Been a Victim Her Entire Life (1.18)

After staggering plotlines far longer than what is reasonably sane, Ringer seems to be burning through the lingering story arcs in time for its approaching finale. As a result, there's a definite sense of forward momentum that pulses through this episode. Just like the pushing of financial hooey a couple of weeks back and the repetition of one-sided phone calls in... every damn episode, there was a definite over-reliance tonight on characters vanishing without a trace, but the show did a neat job of tying together the frequently scattered ensemble cast, all of whom interacted with each other in at least some capacity this week.

Ringer: What We Have Is Worth the Pain (1.17)

I don't know if Ringer's quest to pull from continuity is really such a good thing. It's great in theory, finally confirming that the writers seem to know where the story is going and that they've been planning all of this for months -- but in execution you get a ton of awkward flashback scenes to episodes as far back as the pilot. It's the show stumbling into that strange contradiction where things are horribly sign-posted while simultaneously convoluted. Generally, this episode was mighty convoluted, opening with inauspicious exchanges about flash-drives and CEO crookery, before becoming sort of entertaining. In the midst of all this were enough personality changes to generate concerns for schizophrenia, but somehow it all washed over me.

Ringer: You're Way Too Pretty to Go to Jail (1.16)

Have I entered the Twilight Zone? Is the sky green? Is water dry? Is Agent Machado suddenly interesting? Ringer has appropriately spent the last six months pulling the rug from under us at every opportunity, forsaking almost all character consistency in the process, and this episode fell into that pattern once more, only with a crazed hootenanny of exposition and stupid decisions. I think I liked this episode. It was kind of frantic and amusing in a really lightweight sense, and I was never exactly bored. It's only on closer inspection that literally every plot development falls to pieces.

Ringer: P.S. You're an Idiot (1.15)

Sorry if these reviews are becoming as predictable as turkey on Thanksgiving, but Ringer rapidly cycles through the same exact problems every damn week. This was another episode in which nothing of huge consequence actually occurred, but ended on a couple of cliffhangers that managed to give the illusion of the complete opposite. Now that I think about it, that's totally this show's routine! The writers flail around the multiple story arcs and tease them out until they're directionless disaster areas, but ensure that each episode is capped by some fake-out plot twist that encourages the audience to tune in the following week, even when we all collectively realize that nothing will actually come of the 'to be continued' shockers. Ringer is all about manipulation, folks, and based on the abysmal numbers it's been getting recently, it seems most people have figured that out.

Ringer: Whores Don't Make That Much (1.14)

Before Ringer turned into a convoluted mess dangling perilously close to the edge of Mount Cancellation, there was actually a relatively simple idea at its heart. Way back in the pilot, Bridget took over her sister's identity in a shocking moment of ill-conceived craziness, a rash decision that quickly devolved into assassination attempts, marital intrigue and contrived mystery-solving that would make even Jessica Fletcher wince in embarrassment. But at the crux of the show was that initial decision, a chance of potential escape from Bridget's eternally rock-bottom existence that she instantly leaps at. Whores Don't Make That Much, the strongest episode in a long while, finally threw that decision into perspective, granting Sarah Michelle Gellar the emotionally-draining material that she's been crying out for.

Ringer: It's Easy to Cry, When This Much Cash Is Involved (1.13)

Ringer is a series that works well in bits and pieces, but struggles to be much at all when put together as a whole episode. This was very much an hour of varying subplots being thrown at us all at once -- some that haven't been seen for weeks, some that are painful in their predictability, and others that essentially feel like a bombardment of uninteresting information. The latter is obviously occurring with Bridget who, for the second week in a row, gets driven around Manhattan picking up clues in ridiculous places. It's another waste of the character, somebody stuck in stumble-mode where she conveniently walks right into the path of another clue, all the while completely ignorant to the fact that her sister is so obviously alive. It's ludicrous that she hasn't even theorized that Siobhan's suicide was faked.

Ringer: What Are You Doing Here, Ho-Bag? (1.12)

It's become routine in recent years for writers to present networks with a multi-season plan when it comes to serialized dramas. In light of high-profile failures like Heroes, it makes sense for networks to request some kind of long-term agenda, preventing a series from sputtering along with writers making things up as they go. Ringer is an example of a series that clearly has one of those long-term plans (it's something the EPs have mentioned a lot in interviews), but is struggling to execute it very well. This episode was of course better than last week's flat series return, but the overriding problems lie in the little things -- it's all good providing shock twists and interesting plot developments, but the journey getting there needs to be interesting, too.

Ringer: It Just Got Normal (1.11)

After middling reviews, dwindling ratings and an extended hiatus, I had expected Ringer's return to be a lot more auspicious than it actually was. Taking the show off the air for two months usually results in a little bit of behind-the-scenes tinkering, but annoyingly It Just Got Normal was more of the same. While I wasn't exactly any less enthused than I was back in November, there didn't seem to be many attempts here to forward the show's momentum, especially when most of the stories have barely lurched on from where we last left them. Considering the CW plugged the hell out of Ringer's comeback, it's a little disappointing.

Ringer: That's What You Get for Trying to Kill Me (1.10)

Regular readers will probably be aware that I've had a complicated relationship with Ringer. There were times when I've thought it was genuinely absorbing and fun, then there were other times when I got entirely bored by the damn show. But as Ringer wraps up the first half of its season, I'm left with that general feeling that it's not exactly terrible. I don't think Ringer will ever be high art, and I don't even think the show is going to hit that stride of soapy awesomeness I really wish it would pursue but, for what it is, the show is fine. There were parts of this episode that really frustrated me, but it had a drive to it that I found weirdly entertaining.

Ringer: Shut Up and Eat Your Bologna (1.9)

Unfortunately, I feel like I'm at that point where Ringer has lost me. I still watch the show, and I'll tune in and review for the rest of the season, but my general interest in the characters and the storylines has drifted, and I don't think I'm ever gonna be completely drawn in again. I bring this up because Shut Up and Eat Your Bologna featured a ton of movement in several story arcs, but I was never particularly engaged with any of it. When that sort of thing occurs, you can't help but feel that the show's general tone just doesn't work for you.

Ringer: Maybe We Can Get a Dog Instead? (1.8)

This was a far more character-driven episode than any of the ones preceding it, but lacking in anything particularly juicy. All the show needs to do now is find some kind of balance between the two. While I enjoyed a lot of the character beats on offer here, it was an hour that was practically crying out for something additionally soapy and ridiculous. And on that front the episode came up short. Up until the FBI wire scene, this was a major snooze-fest.

Ringer: Oh Gawd, There's Two of Them? (1.7)

The twists are fun, but that nagging problem I was talking about last episode continued to obscure my enjoyment of the show. Bridget is still an enigma, and it feels like the writers are bending her character in strange directions depending on the scene that she's in. She opens the hour being all conniving by spinning more lies in the direction of Andrew and Henry, to throw off the feds. Soon after she pines for Malcolm and their brief fling. Then she turns to shady NA sponsor Charlie, telling him he's the only person she can trust. Then she has an intimate moment with Andrew, and they share their first romantic kiss since the twin switcheroo. I'm struggling to understand anything of her motivation. And while the crazy soap opera cliffhangers prove momentarily distracting, the characterization will eventually be the death of this show if the writers don't shape up.

Ringer: The Poor Kids Do It Everyday (1.6)

So I guess Bridget is abandoning the concept of making this a 'short-term' deal. And I guess Siobhan is straight-up evil. I like both girls a lot (well, more than I did at the beginning of the series), but it would be foolish to claim that they were being written well. A problem with a show like this, one that depends on twists and cliffhangers, is that in the relentless pursuit of curve-balls to throw at us, the writers become susceptible to losing track of the protagonists involved. The Poor Kids Do It Everyday did a good job of adding new levels to both sisters, but I'm not sure they totally worked from a logic stand-point.

Ringer: A Whole New Kind of Bitch (1.5)

This was the strongest episode so far, if only because it's clear that the writers are in the process of fixing some of Ringer's inherent problems. The biggest being that the entire premise of this show is more than a little, I don't know, silly: "Solution to my twin sister supposedly killing herself? I got it! I'll steal her entire identity!" The best moment here was Gemma's on-point put-down of Bridget's elaborate lie. As much as Bridget likes to claim that she's only keeping this charade up in order to 'fix things' in Siobhan's life, her actions are pretty self-serving.

Ringer: It's Gonna Kill Me, But I'll Do It (1.4)

One of the promises made by the writers prior to the series premiere was that mysteries wouldn't unfold at a glacial pace, and that answers will be given at a speed which would satisfy the viewer. Sometimes this formula can backfire a little, like in the busy pilot and its abundance of illogical plot twists. But what the show did here was throw everything up in the air, setting in motion events that will obviously create shock-waves throughout the entire series. Being so soon into the show's existence, it's pretty exciting.