Like most two-parters on this show, Valhalley of the Dolls runs out of material midway through this second half. The valkyrie story has a couple of cool moments (notably the Russ Meyer-ish motorcycle sequence), but it mostly devolves into messy fighting sequences and repeated moments where Piper dithers over her allegiances. In some ways it reminded me of the Fury episode in season four, only with a pretty flat ending where everybody says goodbye and the valkyries exit without a huge resolution.I never really understood the logic of Piper telling Leo to stay away from her in order to make his departure less painful. Isn't that sort of the equivalent of abandoning a dying relative so to prepare yourself for their eventual passing? It would have been more effective if Piper ended their relationship purely out of her own unhappiness, and her dissatisfaction with how their marriage has turned out.
The subplots filling up the time here are far worse than their Part 1 counterparts. Paige's dog-walking thing is ridiculous, filled with terrible Look Who's Talking Too CGI and guest stars who were Z-listers years ago but now only make this show look even more dated than usual. Then there's Phoebe and Jason groping each other and making erection gags in front of a crowded office of gawkers, before fucking beneath his desk right after shutting the door. Ugh. This show could not get more trashy.
Valhalley of the Dolls Part 1 had some appeal, but this was pretty tedious most of the time. Couple that with a bunch of horrible subplots and it doesn't spark a whole lot of confidence for the rest of the season. D+
Crimes of Fashion Paige seriously looks like a hooker when she's about to embark on her dinner date with the dog. The dress is ridiculously tight, too short and too low up top. What's the matter with her?
Credits
Guest stars Melissa George (Freyja); Ivana Milicevic (Mist); Colleen Porch (Kara); Evan Marriott (Oscar); Eric Dane (Jason Dean)
Writer Brad Kern Director James L. Conway
Spot on review. Read my mind. Poor Melissa George by the way. She deserved better than this crap!
ReplyDeleteHilarious review. I'm with you on a lot of this one. Stretched out too far.
ReplyDeleteThe Phoebe and Jason thing is so aggravating here, she's a complete slut. Doesn't even try to hide it anymore, Christ (I rant about this in my own review as well).
As for Piper and Leo, I thought the whole thing was weird right from the start. It's really difficult to analyse their motivations this season in any logical way. It's a complete mess.
I agree with both of you on Melissa though, she shouldn't have been subjected to this!
I'm anticipating a massive rant about 'The Power of Three Blondes' next week, but I'll prepare you: I actually enjoyed it. A lot. God help me!
The Power of Three Blondes is one of my favorite Charmed comedy epiosodes EVER along with Chick Flick & Sense And Senseability!
ReplyDeleteLove the echoing of the Melissa George love. She's such an incredible actress. You should check out this movie she did called Triangle. Great movie, but she anchored it so well.
ReplyDeleteAgreed about the weak Piper/Leo motivation, as well as Phoebe and Jason.
But The Power of Three Blondes? Really? Ugh. But it's so tacky and trashy, with terrible sex gags and horrible subplots! Heh. Can't wait to read your comments on that one.
I've been dying to see Triangle for so long and never got the chance. Heard she's wonderful in it and the premise intrigued me! You've encouraged me to find it NOW!
ReplyDeleteAnother crap episode.
ReplyDelete